Womens' testimonies regarding use of the Pill
Some Women Tell their Stories
“At age 35 I got married and we tried for a family from the beginning of our marriage. In the first year of marriage we attended [a] talk on the abortifacient (abortion-causing) nature of the contraceptive pill. I listened in horror as I learnt it is possible to conceive and then lose a child by early abortion while using the pill. I was in shock and remained in shock for quite a few years after that. I think sometimes I am still in shock when I ponder on that fact alone. How many years I lived in the “ culture of death”.
In effect I was wishing the death of my children when taking the contraceptive pill and engaging in sexual activity. The thought of one day meeting Jesus and hearing Him say to me “these are the children you have aborted though your use of the contraceptive pill” was very distressing. But God’s grace and infinite mercy can and does bring healing. I deeply regretted the fact that I hadn’t made more of an effort to inform my conscience but in my teenage years and twenties I didn’t seem to have the inclination, determination and resolve to do so (MM, Personal communication 22 August 2007).
Story 2 - regret
“For the very first time in my life, I came to grips with the fact that I had not only shut myself off to life, but had also destroyed an unknown number of children.
As I came out of that exhibit (The Wonder of Life) there was a giant rushing water fountain nearby. I walked over to it and began to sob uncontrollably. I stayed there for some time, absorbed in my sudden feelings of grief and remorse. This was the very first time I became aware of the full impact of what I had done.
…I am here to say that I will be “Silent No More” about the children that I aborted through birth control”.
Story 3 - Infertility
“I took the contraceptive pill from age 21 to 34 continually. It seemed like the sensible thing to do, to regulate my periods and keep away nasty period pains. When I got married at 35, my husband and I discovered we were infertile. When we went for treatment, the doctors told me my thirteen years on the pill had most probably been a big contributing factor in my infertility causing low cervical mucus levels and various other problems.
I was initially quite angry that my doctor or someone else in my life hadn’t informed me that infertility could result from pill usage. I accept totally that my contraceptive usage is probably the reason we may never have children (personal communication 22 August 2007)
Story 4 - What about children born to a contraceptive marriage?
“My mother encouraged me to use the pill in my teens and twenties. She had used it herself in her own marriage. I wish now I had more brothers and sisters. I feel I have missed out. Now my mother wishes she herself had more grandchildren… Mum and dad are separated. Mum’s quite lonely now. And through my infertility through my own contraceptive use, I’ve no children for her. I can see now how contraceptive use travels down the family”
(Sharon M, Personal Communication 2007)
Story 5- Contraceptive fosters an abortion mentality
“Twelve years of dabbling in contraceptive use – all the while exposing myself to the possibility of chemical abortion, could so easily have culminated in surgical abortion…
In contraceptive intercourse you are engaging in risk-taking behaviour. A baby doesn’t come into it. All you’re thinking of is the sexual activity – it eliminates the baby – emotionally, mentally, psychologically.
Had I conceived it would then have been so easy to eliminate the baby by an abortion. It is such a small step from mental elimination of the baby to its physical elimination. There’s such a difference from contraceptive sexual activity to true marital intercourse.” (SM Personal Communication)
This lady’s experience reflects exactly what John Paul II wrote on the contraceptive mentality:
“It may be that many people use contraception with a view to excluding the subsequent temptation to abortion. But the negative values inherent in the “contraceptive mentality”…are such that they strengthen this temptation when an unwanted life is conceived”(Evangelium Vitae n13)
The statistical evidence indeed proves that the majority of babies that are aborted when conceived during contraceptive intercourse. The predominant reasons cited why women use contraception are often the very same for women electing an abortion. Abortion and contraception are closely connected, “as fruits of the same tree”(EVn13)
“Abortion becomes the only decisive response to failed contraception” (cfEVn13).
Story 6 There is hope!
“Despite my years of contraceptive use, and having lived away from our Catholic faith, which caused us much unhappiness and regret, my husband and I are now back in our faith with a fervour and are determined to remain protected within the boundaries that God has set up for us.
I see now how the laws of the Gospel are for our liberation. They are not to shackle or restrict our freedom.
We refuse now to get involved in anything against Catholic teaching. I rejoice in the fact that God is a loving, merciful, forgiving, understanding, caring, and bountiful God who loves me unconditionally and eternally without resentment or prejudice” (Personal communication).
All citations from “Who’s at the Centre of Your Marriage..The Pill or Jesus Christ? Contraception’s disintegrating effect on marital harmony” by Patrick McCrystal, Published by Human Life International (Ireland) 2009. www.humanlife.ie